I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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