this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
