I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
thus making me awesome and them whores
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Randomize
