I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Randomize
