Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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