another moral hangover. fuck.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
