remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
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