Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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