Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Randomize
