i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
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