Kiss
Puke
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
