How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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