imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
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and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
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Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize