Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
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