In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
you mean i was at the winter classic?
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Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
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booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing