don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
