so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Nobody cheats on THIS.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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