Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Banned from zoo.
Again?
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
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Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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