I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I'm like, not good at living.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
