I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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