Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
