Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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