And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
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