Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
