At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
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