well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
they're like a gay fantastic four
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog