Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
