Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize