He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize
