the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
