So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Randomize
