dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
NoShamevember. You game?
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Randomize
