Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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