Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
