We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
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