I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
