you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize
