i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Randomize
