flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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