I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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