I hate all girls vehemently.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
