I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
