Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
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So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
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The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
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