They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16