was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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