well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
