i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
