he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
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