I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
