Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Actions speak louder than pants.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
