When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Are my feet made of real feet?
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
